Why people do not see God

People often wonder why there are people who do not believe in God. Maybe it is because they do not see the God in the people claiming Him. Maybe if the churches done more than just stayed to themselves or been involved in their communities. Maybe if the churches actually not only prayed but helped them in this life people would see spirituality and not religion only. Maybe if the sermons weren't focused on clothing but whats inside. If the focus was on God people would see God for themselves.
I know for myself there is a God but as I am getting older and going through I am failing to see the true purpose of the church when it seems to simply assimilate minds into focusing on the wrong things. Praying is great but it is not the only action. God gave us so many things and tools. God is LOVE. Love does not hurt.
Religion vs Spirituality is something people fail to distinguish. Beyond Sunday School and the big hats you have to start to actually do. Something inside is transformed. You begin to LOVE. In Gods Image we are to LOVE one another. Love is not just a word it is an action. I see people going through pain and where is the church..busy teaching about the end times but not bearing the fruit. Its all bark.
This is not ALL churches but majority yes.

Its time to move forward

In my quest of self and rebuilding I have found peace. I think at first after my dad died I was hurt because people did not call come by nothing well at least church people didn't and really neither did fam besides my brothers and sisters mom ofcourse and a few mentionables. I found myself questioning peoples I love you, I wasn't shocked though and now it is ok. I discovered true love and wrapped myself so tight in that the fact of who wasn't calling got deleted from my mind and replaced with the ones that were. It no longer matters because I am at peace.

My Daddy was very special to me. I was his shadow as a kid even when he drove a taxi. I was small about 3 or 4 when we picked up Kool and the Gang not knowing who they were but that they looked cool and loved to pinch my cheeks, my Dad tucked me in every night, Hugged me all the time and always said I love you. I am carrying that inside of me. His teachings, his love, his laughter is all inside of me. In fact we have the same exact birthmark except mines was on my arm and bigger while his was on his leg. I loved him dearly..correction I love him dearly. I will miss him and no I will never stop speaking his name. Herndon Obediah Lee..you are loved and missed.

Chapter 7 Just listen

Esperanza Spalding

Looking into the Darkness

“Your willingness to look at your darkness is what empowers you to change.”
Iyanla Vanzant.


The journey that have been on to many truths. It has torn down a lot of beliefs I had which is not a bad thing because truth is truth. I realized people are selfish from all the BS that has been brought to me while morning my father without one person asking "How are you?" but yet bringing me bull and this applies to people in general. But then I have seen a sweet side from people who are complete strangers or associates that sent me a word or a hug and that has shown me HUMANkind.

So as I begin this journey I decided to look inside my soul and get acquainted with me. I looked my fears face on and decided to be courageous. I realized manyt hings I didn't do was because other people said I couldn't or because they wanted to mold me and the truth is I allowed it because I did not have confidence in myself enough to say no. That was when I was younger now as an adult, full grown woman I find myself hungry to do those things and I am going to go for them all no matter how silly they sound because I CAN. Without motive I must move forward and develop the passion inside me for many things. Things can be beautiful when you allow them to be. We were all create with beauty inside of us and if we would just sit back and shine naturally the world would be amazing and people would learn to be kind and respect life.