Dreary rain yeah go away

What is it about the rain that makes you want to go right back to sleep? It is such a soothing sound as I watch it from my bed trickling down the window. It is not a violent rain but a sweet shower the rhythms constant but R&B slow rhythms. Yesterday was yesterday and those troubles that I had in my mind seem to wash away with every drop I see run down my window and I know that life is good. Take time to clear your mind lay back and listen.

BLACKMAIL

I blackmailed myself yeah you read it right. I miss facebook but I said I will not go on there until my book is finished and out of my hands again. Sad that FB is that fire lol. So sad..so sad.
Honestly though I have enjoyed my vacation of being in everyones business because that is all it really is. I am getting to know me all over again. I am ok with the old Lanora evolving just as long as it is for the better. I want my Dad to look down and say "Thats my Sugar Pop's." I want to look in the mirror knowing I feel progress has been made. i do not want the sun to catch me not making progress. That is how to live a stagnant life. I am looking to renovate and rebuild. Create better habit and make better choice while I shoot for the moon and some hits land among the stars, but I want the moon.

The beauty of having children

My kids make me want to be a better person because I want them better. I have to be a better example as a parent in order to be that parent that chooses excellence.
I have to admit my break from social networks and it being more about centering myself, this has been a concern of mines. My children have been through these deaths just like I have and though they seem ok I want to be sure. My daughter is an eater when she is upset and to help her mind and body it is time to implement better habits. My son he is quiet and holds things eternally. At 12 this is normal but he needs an outlet.

I love my kids. They are beautiful examples of Gods creation. They are beautiful. SO in search of self and finding myself I have to also remember my kids and we can all get better together and heal.

one day at a time

Within those devastating 6 months of 2010, those life changing events that stopped me in my tracks and made me think I just might lose my mind I found strength. Gods strength is made perfect in the time of trouble. Me, I am not perfect but if I was not to give credit to God for his power and wonderful acts I would not be acknowledging how I got through. My husband was and is amazing and has been my best friend since we were in 8th grade 20 years of friendship.

Losing our baby was very hard for me and then almost dying in the process brought a new understanding of life and living it to the fullest 2 months after that Daddy was gone suddenly from a heart attack and I learned how to endure when it feel like you can no longer breathe, I am still working on that one and then 2 months after that my husbands sister who I have know more than half her life passed at 23 and again I had to see death has no respect for age. Now is rebuilding and moving forward to find my center again.

My center has been shifted and my perspective has changed when it comes to life and how you are suppose to make it through. I do not take breathing for granted , not one hug or I love you for granted. But now I have found a new journey to find my center in order to flourish once again and it can be frustrating at times. It is like being reborn and you have these eyes you never used before, Everything is brand new because your prospective has changed. I first found myself simply surviving each day. Functioning like robot because my children had to have an example of moving an and know I am ok. THEY come first but now that my kids are ok it is time to process and it is a lot to process but it is happening maybe slower than I want but you can't rush healing. You have to take your time and reflect, use that negative energy in a positive way and find a way to move forward and learn to breathe again. There are no shortcuts only time.

I cannot say where this journey will lead because it is a day by day affair but I will not let the deaths of others be the death of me. That would be dishonoring life and them. They would want me to move forward. I think about that if it was me my daughter would have the hardest time but I am raising her to understand death is a part of life and that I am always with her. I am her mother. My husband has been a part of me since he was born we were made for each other and my godson, stepson who I love his mother made me is Godmommy when he was born and I will always be that. I would want move forward and I know my Dad would want the same for me because he only wanted the best.Therefore I will live courageously one day at a time

Recycle and in return obtain a treasure

At http://www.freecycle.org/ it is a community effort to give and get free stuff from your town that you could use or that you don't need anymore. Instead of filling up the landfill you would be giving new life into that item. The average household contributed as much as 7.9 pounds of waste per person per day and putting items in the Earht produces toxin in the air, Earth and sea. These effects can be cut down only by watching what we throw away and recycling. Freecycle is entirely non-profit and again its free. So sign up on their yahoo board give and get. You never know what treasures you will find.

Happy Birthday Martin Luther King Jr.

Hatred paralyzes life; love releases it. Hatred confuses life; love harmonizes it. Hatred darkens life; love illuminates it.
-Martin Luther King Jr.

You would've been 82 years old today and I want to thank you. I thank you for paving the way even more being one of our martyrs for the cause. One of many that fell and yet you stood strong. Thank you for putting humanity first when it was at such a price. No you were not a perfect man but you were perfectly fitted for the cause. You made a difference and that is why you have a holiday and we thank you. Some still don't understand they do not get why this day is so important to us all not just African Americans but equality makes the World a better place. The right to be treated as humans. We all still struggle but thank you for the progress made. You are loved and appreciated.

What is a wenus?

Can I touch your wenus (wee-nis)?

I heard this on Oprahs Network OWN and busted out laughing like a kid. The researcher in me looked it up and it is something so simple. A wenus is the medical term for elbow particularly the skin on your elbow and that is your strange fact of the day.